- What did Santa say to Mrs. Claus when he saw their Christmas tree? It looks okay, but you could spruce it up a bit.
- Why did the elf hoard all the Christmas presents? He was elfish.
- What do you give a depressed elf? An elf-help book.
- What’s the forecast for Christmas Eve? Rain, dear.
- What should you do if your car stalls on Christmas Eve? You get a mistletow.
- What was Santa’s favorite subject in school?
- Did you hear about the group of reindeer who got into trouble? Yeah, I herd.
- What does Rudolph do when Santa drives too fast? Hold on for deer life.
- Why did the elf win the argument about his ears? He had some good points.
- Why do people assume sheep hate Christmas? They always say “bah humbug.”
- What did Santa and Mrs. Claus name their daughter? Mary Christmas.
- What did the English teacher call Santa’s helpers? Subordinate Clauses.
- What do you call Santa when he accidentally falls in a fireplace? Krisp Kringle.
- What kind of linens to gingerbread men put on their beds? Cookie sheets.
- What is Santa’s favorite kind of candy? Jolly ranchers.
- What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.
- Why can’t vampires bite snowmen? They’ll get frostbite.
- Why is Santa’s favorite way to deliver Christmas presents through the chimney? It soots him.
- What do you call someone who can’t stop thinking about Christmas? Santa-mental.
- What do you call someone who is afraid of Santa? Claus-trophobic.
- Did you hear about the dog who wrote his own Christmas song? It’s called dashchund through the snow.
- What do you say when you give someone a set of spices for Christmas? Season’s greetings.
- How does Darth Vader know what everyone is getting for Christmas? He’s felt their presents.
- What’s the most popular breakfast cereal at the North Pole?
- What did the wise men say after they offered up their gifts of gold and frankincense? Wait, there’s myrrh.
- What’s the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs.
- What did Santa say when someone inquired if one of his workshops was available to rent? For lease, Navidad!
If you’ve got kids in college, it can be hard to decide what to get them. Do they just want gift cards, or should you pick out something more meaningful?
Can you pick out something meaningful that’s small enough to fit in the limited space of their dorm room? Fear not, for we’ve gathered together a guide of some of the best gifts for college students this year.
It includes some of the hottest items every student wants to find in their stockings.
Do not let the behavior of others destroy your inner peace. ~ Dalai Lama
