Marriage is hard. Why? Because life is hard. Relationships are hard. Parenting is hard. Work is hard. The COVID-19 pandemic is hard.
The pre-COVID-19 divorce rate is reported at nearly 50%. It’s anticipated to be even higher post-COVID-19 quarantine. Divorce attorneys have seen an increase in inquiries from people about ending their marriage.
Attorneys are expecting more couples will file for divorce as courts reopen in more states following the easing of pandemic restrictions. For every marriage that was on the brink, the pandemic is pushing some couples over the edge.
Conflicts are an inevitable part of every relationship. Marriage is no exception. Marital fallouts are common. The accumulative effect of unresolved conflicts coupled with unmet expectations, can put you on the divorce fast track.
The Price of Divorce
The negative impacts of divorce are far-reaching. The national average cost of a divorce is about $15,000 per person.
Less if it’s uncontested and more if it’s contested. The costs go well beyond the financial.
The ugly hand of divorce leaves its fingerprints on relationships with the children, and on your behavioral, emotional, and physical health.
Marriage Counseling
While divorce may be necessary and the healthiest choice for some, others may wish to try to salvage whatever is left of the union. When couples encounter problems or issues, they may wonder when it’s appropriate to seek marriage counseling. Here are seven good reasons.
1. Communication has become negative.
2. When one or both partners consider having an affair, or one partner has had an affair.
3. When the couple seems to be “just occupying the same space.”
4. When the partners do not know how to resolve their differences.
5. When one partner begins to act out on negative feelings.
6. When the only resolution appears to be separation.
7. When a couple is staying together for the sake of the children.
Benefits of Marriage Counseling
Sadly, before deciding to divorce, few people take advantage of marriage counseling. This could be due to society’s preconceptions about who needs therapy and what others may think.
However, when your relationship is on the line, the only opinions that matters are that of you and your spouse. Maintaining a marriage and solving marital problems within the marriage takes skills.
Relationship skills that few of us are naturally equipped with. We may think we’re doing all we can to solve the problems in a marriage.
Nonetheless, a marriage counselor can be of great benefit in teaching us new ways of solving problems and getting our needs met.
Five Benefits of Marriage Counseling
You’ll learn how to:
1. Resolve conflict in a healthy manner.
2. Communicate more effectively.
3. Be assertive without being offensive.
4. Process and work through unresolved issues.
5. Develop a deeper understanding of who your spouse is and what their needs are.
Free Counseling vs. Clinical Therapy
Free marriage counselors provide introductory advice. The counselors typically direct clients to resources and referrals for resolving immediate challenges.
However, people who need long-term marriage and family support for serious relationship issues and persistent mental health concerns require the clinical help of a licensed marriage and family therapist.
Here’s why.
The people who provide free therapy options are often unlicensed professionals who offer free therapy and emotional support options as a community service. For example, many churches and community support groups offer free marriage counseling and individual counseling services for their members.
Another benefit of free marriage and family counseling options is to connect you with available volunteer support providers that can help you out in a crisis.
In emergencies, free marriage and family services and referrals are beneficial. The stakes in divorce are high.
However, for chronic mental health sufferers to receive proper diagnosis and treatment for managing chronic mental health disorders that may be contributing to the demise of the marriages, the guidance and psychotherapy support of licensed marriage counselors like a marriage and family therapist is strongly recommended.
If you recognize you need professional counseling services to save your marriage, you should check out ReGain to find a therapist that can give you and your spouse the help you need to save your marriage.
Here’re five things to embrace when choosing marital counseling.
