Discipline And Punishment: Know The Differences
Being a parent, you are faced with many dilemmas every day. Not every child is a little angel. There are situations in which even the most patient parent will lose their temper.
That’s natural, and you shouldn’t be ashamed of that or blame yourself. The most important thing is the way you’ll react to your child’s misbehavior. Your reaction will determine the kid’s further line of conduct.
Most parents can’t see any difference between discipline and punishment. They use these two approaches interchangeably, not realizing both of them have contrary consequences. To establish a right and healthy relationship with your child, you need to differentiate these two terms.
Discipline
Discipline is the way of enforcing some behavior patterns on your children who have just done something wrong. It’s the role of a parent to tell them what is right and wrong, what is appropriate and inappropriate.
So, if you often go with your daughter or son to plastic playgrounds, and they have a fight with their peers, don’t make a public scene and punish them, but wait a moment and talk to them about their behavior in private.
Try to explain to your kid that they can’t argue or beat others, and why. This way, they’ll learn how to solve problems peacefully. It doesn’t mean you can give your kid room to break the rules, but you should instead draw the line and stick to it.
You’re a role model for your offspring, and you should refer to their thinking brain to teach them desirable future behavior. But if you punish them, they won’t draw the right lesson. The only thing they will remember after this incident will be your harshness and injustice.
Punishment
Many people still don’t believe in the effectiveness of positive discipline and reinforcement. Often, these are authoritarian parents who make children pay for their mistakes due to their own feeling of frustration and desperation. Not knowing how to talk to kids results in controlling them.
They claim the only effective method is punishment in the form of slaps, shouting, or time-out. Punishing kids in such a way, however, will have the reverse effect. Punishment is only a temporary solution, which doesn’t teach your child how to solve problems or conflicts. It’ll negatively influence a kid’s brain and emotions.
They’ll only feel fear, but they still won’t know how they should behave in the future. The only thing that will change will be the kids’ way of thinking about themselves. Instead of seeing their fault, they may start perceiving themselves as bad people, which may lead to their low self-esteem, or in extreme cases, even depression.
That’s because you refer to their emotional brain, punishing them for past behavior, and not focusing on what should be improved. Hence, it’s so crucial to distinguish the difference between discipline and punishment since it may have a powerful effect on your kid’s mental health. To find out more in this field, check out this informative infographic:
Here’s a personal experience on parenting and discipline.