Most if not all relationships take work and most relationships involve conflict – some healthy, some unhealthy. Although some couples can resolve the issues on their own, sometimes professional help is needed. A relationship coach may be the answer.
Who Consults A Relationship Coach?
Couples whose communication breaks down may get to the point where they’re unable to have meaningful dialogue. Efforts to talk things out frequently get out of control and lead to rising tempers and voices with nothing resolved.
Conversely, some couples stop talking altogether, freezing conversation indefinitely. At times like these a relationship coach can help to calm things down and get the couple on the path to reconciliation.
How Can A Relationship Coach Help?
The coach will listen to both people talk about the situation and their feelings. The couple may discuss the relationship with the coach individually or together. It depends on how comfortable both are with sharing their innermost feelings in front of each other.
In a series of steps, the coach will guide the couple toward talking to each other in a measured way. He or she will teach them effective communication skills, like focusing on getting each person to take responsibility for his or her emotions instead of blaming the other person.
Contentious issues will be discussed, usually one at a time, until consensus is achieved as to resolving the issue or agreeing to amicably disagree. Conflicts are often prioritized and then addressed by working down the list. Common issues that cause tempers to flare include finances, intimacy, child discipline and in-laws, to name a few.
Many couples experience tremendous relief in finding an expert who will patiently listen to both points of view. They appreciate the opportunity to vent without judgment, and to bring their concerns to an objective professional who can help them examine the issues from more than one perspective.
For the first time perhaps in their relationship, each person will be able to hear the other’s point of view without feeling the need to jump in and offer excuses or attack the other person.
Getting the counselor’s feedback can be eye-opening to couples who have heard only each other’s opinions on various issues. Often, they feel validated and respected. They also begin to have a more tolerant view of the other’s differing viewpoint. This helps them work toward acceptance of their disagreements.
How Does It Work?
A relationship coach can confer with the couple in a conference call by telephone or Skype, or they may choose to meet individually with the counselor. Eventually, however, as they begin to work things out, they will probably meet with the counselor jointly in working toward resolution and restoration.
Sometimes a couple prefers to meet in person with a relationship coach. They prefer the face-to-face interaction of a live meeting rather than a telephone conference. Either way, the coach will work with individuals and pairs to address the most pressing issues of their relationship.
When two people simply cannot make sense of their relationship, a relationship coach can often help. Numerous couples have gotten their relationship back on track and happily recommend it to others.
What if you’re interested in participating in relationship counseling and your partner isn’t? Read Marcie’s article on, “How To Get Your Partner To Consider Relationship Counseling .”
