If you have a loved one who you decide to become the caregiver for, there’s a lot more to think about than simply your caregiving duties. Many people want to bring their parents home to live with them when they reach the point they’re in need of caregiving.
However, this decision can branch out into every other aspect of your life as well. One of the most common difficulties is the strain its puts on your marriage. Here’s a look at some of the ways taking care of loved ones puts stress on a marriage.
Less Time
When you’re dedicating a significant portion of your time to caregiving, it often comes at the expense of spending time with your spouse. This is never good for a marriage.
It’s important to take time to go on dates and spend quality time with your spouse. This may require you to have someone else help with caregiving duties. While taking care of a loved is important, it should never compromise your marriage, as there are options for help.
Adding Responsibilities to Your Spouse
When you have to spend time and energy caring for your loved one, it can cause your spouse to take more responsibility for caring for your children, cooking and other duties.
This can cause a lot of resentment and put strain on the marriage. Be sure to sit down with your spouse and talk about how responsibilities may shift. This way, you can both agree on a plan and decide how they will help take on more work in the home.
Loss of Intimacy
One of the most common side effects of caregiving for a loved one is a loss of intimacy in the marriage.
Because of the lack of time and energy, intimacy often becomes an afterthought.
Never Alone
When you have an elderly parent living with you, they are there almost every minute of the day. This can cause a lot of strain for a couple who were previously used to having regular alone time.
Consider scheduling a day of the week where you go somewhere other than home to be alone. This should be done both as a couple and individually. It’s important each partner can take a break when needed and distance themselves from the stressful situation.
Stress
Of course, the caregiving will stress you both out on a regular basis. When this stress builds up, it’s easy for you to take the stress out by turning on each other. When you are caregiving for a loved one, you need to make sure to look for ways to relieve stress healthily. This includes things like exercise, mediation and massage.
Assisted Living
To avoid the strain caregiving puts on a marriage, many people turn to help from an assisted living facility. Your loved one can get all the care they need in an assisted living situation without putting the added stress on your marriage.
This is one of the best options to pursue when your loved one needs more attention than you can give. While you may want to take care of them yourself, you many not be in a position to do so, and assisted living will actually benefit your loved one more.
Caregiving for a loved one is rewarding but it is never easy. You don’t want to turn you marriage into a casualty because of your big heart. Make sure you take steps to ensure caregiving causes as little stress as possible. If you need help, don’t hesitate to look into options to ease the stress.
Informational credit to Courtyard at Jamestown.
Uncertain as to whether your aging parent needs care? Anita has written another article of eight signs you should look for in your aging parent.
