Easing into the role of a stepparent can be a challenge even under the best of circumstances. However, when you become the stepparent of an infant, you may have no idea how to bond with that baby. It is not like you can verbally reassure the infant into trusting you, nor have a heart-to-heart conversation with “your” new little one.
You must gain the baby’s trust and learn to bond with your infant stepchild through your actions. Knowing what actions to take and resolving to be the best stepparent possible can help you learn to love and bond with the new baby in your life.
1. Make Time for Play
Babies also learn to trust adults through play. You can get the baby to bond with and accept you by getting down on the floor and playing toys with them. Making noises for the toys with your mouth, squeaking and rattling noisemakers, and letting your guard down during these play moments will encourage the little one to look at you as a play mate as well as a parent.
You also will develop love and appreciation for your new stepchild when you bond with them during daily playtime.
2. Do Not Be Afraid of Diaper Duty
Infants learn to trust people who take care of their physical needs. When you make it a point to change your stepchild’s diaper once or twice a day, the baby will learn to recognize and trust you. If you have never before changed a diaper, you may shirk from this duty.
However, resolving to change one or two diapers a day while smiling, talking to, and cooing at the baby at the same time will show that infant that you love him or her and can provide for their immediate physical needs.
3. Help During the Midnight Feedings
Many babies are at their most anxious during the early morning hours when they awake hungry, soiled, and cold. Rather than pushing this duty off onto your spouse, you can show you want to bond with them by getting up and feeding the hungry baby during the middle of the night.
If you are nervous about holding them, use his or her best nursing pillow and prop them on it while you feed them. This will help you and the baby to be more comfortable. Allowing the other parent to sleep while you feed, change, walk with, and bounce your fussing stepchild can help the baby learn to trust you. In time, you will be one of the few adults from whom that child seeks comfort.
4. Get to Know Everything about Your Stepchild
One of the best ways to bond with your new step-infant is to learn everything about them. Learn the name of their baby formula, what kind of baby food they prefer, the name of their pediatrician, and even the brand of diapers that give the baby a rash.
Making an effort to develop a vested interest in the new baby in your life will help you form a bond that will last a lifetime.
Bonding with stepchildren can be difficult. Bonding with a new step-infant can be even more of a challenge when you fear the baby will never learn to love or trust you. However, you can take several steps to develop a relationship with the new infant brought into your life. These suggestions can help you build a relationship that will endure for the rest of your life.
Melanie Fleury has experienced the joys of bonding with not just her own children, but foster children as well. She finds the best way to keep the baby comfortable is to keep the little one’s favorite objects, from the best nursing pillow to the favorite blankie or toy, close by.
